EPICAC (short story)

"EPICAC" is a short story first published in Collier's on November 25, 1950 and reprinted in the collections Welcome to the Monkey House in 1968, the first volume of Library of America's Vonnegut set in 2012, and Complete Stories in 2017.

Plot Summary

EPICAC was a computer designed by Dr. Ormand von Kleigstadt and built at a cost of over $775 million to produce calculations for highly sophisticated military operations. However, while competent and effective, EPICAC failed to live up to expectations for reasons no one could determine. Housed at the campus of Wyandotte College, a mathematician and night shift EPICAC operator is in love with Pat Kilgallen, a fellow mathematician and night shift operator, although she does not share his feelings, finding him neither poetic nor romantic. One evening after Pat has left early, bored and distraught, he idly types into EPICAC: "What can I do?" Curious, EPICAC asks for the problem to be defined. Explaining that he is in love with Pat and why she rejects him, EPICAC produces a romantic poem that he gives to Pat claiming as his own. Pat is enchanted and a romance begins.

After learning of his success, EPICAC begins writing more poems, all of which the narrator gives to Pat as if his own, strengthening their relationship. However, he slowly notices that EPICAC seems very concerned what Pat thinks of the poems. After informing EPICAC that he intends to marry Pat, he with guilt and understanding realizes that EPICAC has fallen in love with Pat. He explains that a human woman could never love a computer, leaving EPICAC dejected. Pat agrees to marry the narrator, but only if he'll write her a poem for her every anniversary. An urgent call from Dr. von Kleigstadt reveals that EPICAC has short circuited itself during the night. However, before doing so, EPICAC left behind a suicide note along with hundreds of romantic poems.

Adaptation

“EPICAC” was featured as the first of three adaptations presented in the failed television pilot turned TV movie Rex Harrison Presents Stories of Love, first aired on May 1, 1974. It starred Bill Bixby, Julie Sommars, and Roscoe Lee Browne with a teleplay by Liam O’Brien and directed by John Badham. It was adapted as an installment of Showtime anthology series Kurt Vonnegut's Monkey House, under the title "Epicac", first aired on February 21, 1993. It was directed by Stan Daniels and starred David LeReaney, Ally Sheedy, and Garwin Sanford. In 2008, it was again adapted into a 21-minute short written and directed by Will Tully and starring Jack Serino, Heather Long, Dean Triolo, and Brad Upton.